ceraso83
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Name: Thomas
Country: Canada
State: Ontario
Metro: Toronto
Gender: Male


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Member Since: 4/4/2003

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Sunday, January 06, 2008

Wow, so alot of people still read my blog I guess haha. My hit counted jumped up in the last 24 hours. LOL

Even tho I WAS just updating this for someone who didn't really think I should keep updating, I'll finish my story.

So I wrote the UFE, I ended up getting on the National Honour Roll haha, and Lindsay was the Ontario gold medalist....Scarborough represents ---- BRRRRRRAPPP!

This is the cockiest thing I've ever posted on my blog prolly, but I was just happy to pass, so I think being proud about my acheivement this ONCE is allowable.

I was in the globe & mail, the CA magazine, & there was an article written about Lindsay & I (mostly Lin) on the UTSC website. You can check out these links if you wanna see my name haha, but I'm mostly pasting this here so I'll always have the link. :P

http://webapps.utsc.utoronto.ca/ose/story.php?id=879

and

http://www.cica.ca/download.cfm?ci_id=41579&la_id=1&re_id=0

lol. that's all.

Now I'm just working at E&Y, the excitment is over, and the realization that I'm actually done school for the first time in my life has set-in, and a part of me realizes I still kind of want to take classes in something -- I just don't know what!

Latez


Friday, January 04, 2008

Does anyone read my blog anymore? I doubt it but I'm really very curious.

So I guess I'll write an update over the past few months.

I went to HK & Japan in July and I don't think I really wrote about that here. It was an awesome trip. I did two stupid things in planning that trip. First, I went to HK to see a guy. A guy who I had a great three-four weeks with in Toronto, and then begged me to go visit him on my time off. That was a mistake, since as soon as I landed he said he really had no interest in me and was using me as an excuse to not date guys in HK since he's a work-a-holic - so I was on my own.

Then I set-up a side-trip with my friend from University to go to Japan. I began to think he may have had some interest in me in the weeks leading up to the trip, just from how our convo's were becoming on msn, so I asked him "are you flirting with me, because this isn't some sort of sex trip and i don't plan on sleeping with my friends". He reassured me that he had no intention to do so.

The night we landed in Tokyo he got me drunk and tried to sleep with me -- after I told him off I was again, alone in an Asian city.

Travelling alone is something I never thought I'd be able to do. I've always been independent with regards to certain things and very much dependent with regards to others. Exploring completely foreign cities was one of those things I didn't think I could do alone.

It ended up being the best trip of my life. I met so many people, made so many friends, and had so many new experiences that really broadened my views on people, cultures, and different ways of life.

As soon as I returned from the trip I began to study for the UFE. I actually ended up doing okay on the SOA which helped to raise my confidence a bit, but I was still really nervous. In my practice cases I was doing OKAY, but I began to worry as my study group was constantly improving, but I was pretty much staying at the same level.

Meh....Will update this later, I forgot how hard it is to stay focused on a long blog.

Maybe I'll only update it if I see that ppl still read it lol.  

Latez


Wednesday, August 15, 2007

I bought 7 books last night and I can't wait to read them!

Does that make me a nerd?

Latez


Tuesday, August 14, 2007

I love how Michelle gets FEATURED in articles on msn.ca...

“Dream Job” – Not Just a Myth

Canada Speaks

Whether you’re a butcher, a baker or a candlestick maker, chances are you love your job. Shocked? Not if you’re one of the nearly 30 per cent of Canadians working at your dream job,  or one of almost three times that number who admit to “loving” your boss.

Positive words to describe the daily grind, but according to a recent survey conducted by Sympatico / MSN, Canadians appear to be less disgruntled than one might imagine when it comes to making a living.

While a mere 10 per cent of all Canadians have landed in their childhood fantasy career, perhaps that’s because most kids don’t have an understanding of what actuaries, business analysts or systems administrators really do, as opposed to more popular choices such as teachers, actor/singers or astronauts.

So what’s with all of the good feelings around work life? Money, for one. The survey found that cold, hard cash is the best motivator for nearly 40 per cent of Canadian employees, but it’s not top of the list for everyone.

Take Michelle Dunkel, a 23 year old accountant working for one of Canada’s “Big Four” firms. A year into her career, Michelle’s motivation in landing her role was based on location over compensation, similar to 13 per cent of the survey’s respondents.

“I knew I wanted to live in Toronto, and that was a non-negotiable factor in my mind,” said the Waterloo, Ont. native. “Starting salary was something I didn’t take into account because I knew that it’s fairly regulated in my field for junior employees. I was much more focused on finding a firm with a good culture and a great location.”

The Canada Speaks survey highlighted that while a quarter of respondents ‘live to work’, most Canadians (72 per cent) ‘work to live’, a sentiment that Dunkel shares.

“Obviously, work is important. You should enjoy what you do and feel satisfied, but at the same time it shouldn’t be your only source of fulfilment,” she said. “Growing up I always participated in extracurricular activities, and I don’t want to give up the rest of my life for my job now.”

Yet, despite all of these contented workers, 28 per cent are contemplating job changes, and 29 per cent are considering dabbling in a new field altogether. “My generation realizes how important it is to find a job they love, and in order to do that you sometimes need to try a few things.  If you’re happy, you’re more passionate and work doesn’t become work anymore. The people who know this are usually successful,” Dunkel said, noting that she was given good advice by her parents when choosing her own career path. “They told me to explore my options, take the time to see what’s out there, and don’t settle for the first thing you find.”

The Canada Speaks survey was conducted by Ipsos Reid on behalf of Sympatico / MSN between July 20 and July 24, 2007.

Latez


Sunday, August 12, 2007

It's like an up-hill battle this path before me.
Created by those who don't even know.
Don't even take the time to know who I am.

I don't want to fight someone else's battle.
But I will fight for something that feels real.
Because anything good is worth fighting for.

Wow....convoluted.

I need to expand on this my venting isn't really done because my tummy feels all twisted which means I'm overthinking and I need to write. HAHA.

Sometimes this personality of mine pisses me off. I can become far too focused on things.

I waver between cold and rational (read: jaded) and intensely emotional. Everyone has their share of pain in this life, and that pain is what makes us all unique and strong people. But strength can be an ironic thing when it comes to friendships and relationships. I can't speak for others, but in my life things have sort of taken the following path:

As a kid, I came from a household that was always concerned with appearances. Needing to show-off to neighbours who didn't care about us in the firstplace. Needing to present this perfect family image. It's usually the case that the most screwed-up families find the need to appear the most perfect, and I don't think this was any different in my family.

A nuance in my family that I find doesn't always exist, and actually complicates and contradicts the intended effect of the above, was the fact that my mom always feared people. She was scared not only of their judgement, but that they would steal from her. That they would lie. People were innately bad to her, and thus the same was taught to me during my upbringing.

And so I was taught to keep everything inside. "Don't tell anyone about your mother's drinking" okay dad. "Don't let anyone know what kind of things we own" okay mom. "Don't share with anyone. They will take advantage of you." okay mom. "Don't open up to people, they will hurt you." okay...

But I can remember at a very young age seeing the unhappiness in my parents. The way they would fight and argue was so different then the way other parents seemed to act, this is why I stopped bringing people to my home at a young age.....anyhow before I get onto an even greater tangent...I decided to be the opposite of what my parents taught me. I made this decision when my family moved from Burlington to Markham. I was 12. It was a new start. I could make new friends, become close to people, stop being a loner...and I think to a certain extent it worked.

But the bad thing about being open, is that in some ways my parents were right...you are open to alot more pain. People have many more ways to attack you, to hurt you. But unlike how my parents saw it, I don't believe that people are innately bad. People will act out and sometimes you will get hurt. But as long as you are strong enough, you will always bounce back, and the pain will often be just a learning experience.

When people start dating, they tend to apply the same principles used to maintain friendships, afterall, a boyfriend is really just an extremely close and intimate friend, to me the best boyfriend is close enough that you share things like with a best friend...so when I started dating I continued to be open.

But then, these "friendships" might be too intimate, they become too close to you, so its even harder to bounce back when you get hurt. The pain is that much deeper, that much harder to handle, solely because of the nature and closeness of the relationship.

So I guess you could say I learned a few lessons. Three to be exact.

Don't fall in love with your best friend - that was the first one.
Don't fall in love with someone who has yet to love himself - that was the second.
Don't fall in love at all - that was the third.

And for some reason, I thought the third would last, at least for a while longer. The last one is what people like to call bitterness I guess. That extra something special that makes a person bitter. You begin to analyze relationships on a factual basis. Is this person tall enough? Does this person have a good job? Does this person have bad breath? Does this person care about their hair? Their car? Their body? You no longer date people based on the possibility of love. Read on to get what I mean...

I'm the kind of guy who knows pretty much immediately what I want in life and with relationships its really no different. I never used to pay attention to the specific things about a person that drew me to them. If you ask me now, about the few guys I've truly cared about, I could list off a million things I adored about them, but I'd be hard-pressed to tell you even one thing that annoyed me. Yet I can remember first meeting them, and liking them and telling my friends "I wish I knew why....but I just don't"

I always dated based on that feeling. That chemical spark. That constant thinking about someone you've just met. And its a feeling I never get. Something so rare, so hard to find in my life that I believed I wouldn't find it again. That's why the last time I "learned" not to fall in love, I stopped looking. Instead I started looking for someone who I could list alot of good qualities about, with few bad, yet even one bad quality would be enough for me to call it off. But why? Am I superficial? Am I picky? I don't really think so - I think its because I was dating without that chemistry, without the true attraction that drives me. That thing beyond the physical, beyond the mental, that unexplainable driving force that brings two compatible people together.

It would be silly to say that I'm ready to look for that spark again, but it would be a lie to say I wasn't starting to think it was alot easier to find.

Alright alright....it's still convoluted. But I feel better.

Latez



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